Live to Work
I met up with a friend whom I haven’t seen for awhile. She’s a lawyer in the city and lives in a decent high rise in Manhattan. So it depressed me to hear that she’s not happy with her job, which she really worked hard for many years to get. She completely took me by surprise when she told me she would rather make creative stuff like stationery and sell it on Etsy…
Is something different with my generation? (Somewhere between what the media calls the X and Y generation) My friend seemed to think that we’re just itching to do so much more. I wonder if we were given these high expectations that make us so restless until we fulfill another accomplishment on our checklists. Maybe we’re just all spoiled and should suck it up and keep the jobs that make us unhappy.
I went to graduate school to change careers from finance. After every job, I would always hit a plateau where I would feel completely bored and unchallenged by my work. I couldn’t see myself waking up every morning to go to a job I hated. I hated pretending to look busy and getting paid for it. I hated looking at the clock. I hated feeling depressed Sunday nights because the weekend was over. And I hated hearing people complain about their work and I don’t want to be one of those people. I wanted to be happy and do something I love that is meaningful or creative so I jumped into grad school.
Even though I don’t have a job, I can’t regret my decision to go to grad school. At least I had to give myself that chance. I know so many bright people from top schools who are unemployed now and I know it’s more an indication of the economy and about having luck and connections.
But even if I reach the mountaintop, I wonder if it would still be a matter of time before I get disillusioned and unhappy. Over and over again, I hear some of my most successful friends feeling unhappy with their jobs even though they get to help people and travel all over the world on their company’s dime. If they can’t be happy with their dream jobs, what is work exactly supposed to mean for us?
Of course there are those who are completely happy with what they’re doing. I just wonder why some people still can’t be happy with their ideal jobs and if their unhappiness comes from something else.
In the end I realize that work doesn’t define us. Personally, I feel like I have to be great in some way; I think we all do. But it’s not about that at all. I believe we’re all just given different roles and none are better or worse than the other.
I found some quote on a friend’s blog that resonated with me:
I don’t think God said, ‘I have something greater for you to do.’ This life is not greater than the other, but it is different. That is all. For some our Father chooses one, for some He chooses the other, all that matters is that we should be obedient ‘unto all meeting of His wishes.’”
This doesn’t answer anything about getting a job that can make me happy, but just allows myself to be… happy.
An interesting article discussing the quarter-life crisis. I don’t necessarily agree with everything in there, but it does provide one perspective.
http://www.eyeweekly.com/print/article/55882
This issue was always complicated for me, something that I never really resolved in my own head. For me at least, it always boiled down to a pair of conflicting philosophies on work. One follows the idea of continuously searching for a job that is both meaningful and satisfying. The other is to find a job that you can do decently, don’t hate, and that provides you with the time, flexibility, and resources to pursue what ultimately interests you. I think only a small number of people are blessed to have the first, and the rest of us fall into the latter category.
Part of me wonders if perhaps we’re trying to derive the wrong thing out of work, using it to bring contentment and satisfaction to our existence. The bible study leader in me would point out that many of us take work as an idol, trying to derive our identity and ultimate satisfaction from our careers when we should instead be searching for that satisfaction within Christ. On a secular note, I wonder if the breakdown of traditional expectations due in large part to the looser economic and social constraints we have compared to previous generations has put us into the “paradox of choice” where we are now so overwhelmed by all the opportunities before us that we flail trying to figure out what path we should take. We therefore cling to our jobs to derive our satisfaction with some of us lucky enough to be able to do great things with our jobs, but ultimately, we cannot find contentment in it.
Again, I’m still trying to figure all this out (I, like you, went back to graduate school as well for similar reasons). Let me know if you find the answer. ;)